My say:
I sooo totally agree with David Smeidt (the columnist) - he deserves better!
What a shallow-thinking kugel. And a control freak, too, for wanting to change that guy into becoming someone he's not! Gosh, how can anyone be so selfish to even think that?
Are money and ambitions the only things that make people happy? I'd say NO.
Of course, I agree that money is necessary when it comes to starting a family, buying a house, et cetera, but it’s not everything. Gosh, I really don’t know how to put my opinions in words when it comes to these kinda things. It’s just…. That’s it. Money isn’t everything – there are many more things more important, like love, respect and loyalty.
Sure, I used to want to marry someone rich and young and handsome. Hecks, I still tell everyone that the most important thing a guy should have to win my heart is money. But honestly, it’s not. That’s just something I say to get away from people trying to set me up with a stranger – I love surprises, but not blind dates!
I guess being given the chance to meet a single person who fulfilled ALL my ‘Mr Perfect’ criteria made me learn to accept everyone for who they are. My ‘Mr Used-To-Be-Perfect’ was all I asked for – tall, dark, (not-so-strikingly) handsome, funny, (not too) muscular, sensitive, artistic, bla, bla, bla…. I forgot what other things I listed - it was a really long list, I tell you! But that guy came with something else – jealousy, with a capital J. He couldn’t stand me hanging out with my guy pals everyday, which was really unfair since I was in Engineering Faculty and he lived a few hundred kilometres away. Of course I could lepak with only girl friends, but I’d like to play sports and have study groups with my guy friends too. Believe me, being around women all the time doesn’t do you good. You need that change in atmosphere once in a while. And you need that opportunity to be able to swear all you want, and still be the prettiest-looking in the group.
Anyways, I'm sure everyone can already figure out what happened in the end – we broke up. Funny thing is, I was very angry then, so I didn’t cry. When I realized what happened, I was already over him. So I never cried for losing that guy who’s supposed to be the perfect male creature. (Is that normal? Help!)
That experience made me realize that no matter how perfect you think someone is, he/she is still human. And no human being is perfect. In fact, the more perfect you think someone is, the more weaknesses you’ll realize that person has. It’s the balance of nature; it's that simple. It’s up to you whether you can handle the reality of finding out these
weaknesses, and whether you can accept them. I learnt my lesson ten years ago – I couldn’t handle it.
So now I accept people for who they are. No high expectations. As long as you’re not too old or too young (hint… hint…!), I’m fine. As long as you respect me and not too clingy, and I can tolerate your weirdness, that’s ok. If you’re good-looking
or rich, that’s great. If you’re both, yeay! Just as long as you’re human and as long as you can take me for who I am.
Back to the article:
So guys, if you're sweet, quite good-looking, don't have a lot of money and isn't very ambitious (ahem, the first two criteria can be omitted if not necessary), and yuor girlfriend is always curious on your future plans, or her friends are always asking what would you do if you're no longer able to do what you're doing now, then take charge - dump the kugel! Unless if you're the dumb one, that is, willing to spend the rest of your life as her slave, obeying to all her rules... She's only after your money, that's her only turn-on; not your personality, not YOU.
p/s: Kugel is a slang word for ‘materialistic, shallow, I-think-I'm-too-hot-for-anyone bitch’. Thanks Naeema for that - saves a mouthful. (I wonder when she’s gonna start teaching me Afrikaan again?)
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